Texas Chainsaw Mascara - Not A Parody

I have been a long time fan of Bill Zebub films. I also remember a time when he published his zine "The Grimoire of Exalted Deeds". I'm familiar with the style of movies he produces and I know that not many folks would enjoy them. 

However, if you enjoy B-Movies and raunchy naked women running around for no apparent reason then this would be right up your alley. The Texas Chainsaw Massacre happens to be an old favorite of mine so this film peeked my curiosity. 

One of the things that struck me was the level of image quality with the film. I can tell the producer has upgraded his cameras and I noticed some drone scenes at the start of the movie. There's also slow motion parts that are cool at first but could be tone down a bit. 

A basic premise is introduced, we have our characters stranded in the middle of nowhere. The main protagonist are Andrew (Andrew L. Thomas), Mike (Cheyenne Mobbs), Heather (Heather Beck), Danielle (Dani Bliss), CJ (Colvin Burnett), Bill (Aaron Marquez), Marc Pierce as Piggy

Be prepare for tons of dialogue. It's amusing to hear the banter back and forth. It's one of the things that Bill Zebub movies have a lot of and it works well and it has improved over the years.

Without a working vehicle our lost New Yorkers are stuck and Heather, our southern hostess who appears out of nowhere offers a night's stay at her place. Bill Zebub always plays a role in his own movies and this one is no different. We now meet Zombie (Bill Zebub), Piggy and Susan - Mama Bear (Maya Waters). The main conflict between Texans and New Yorkers is at the heart of the problem and our stranded guest now tied up are about to experience some enduring torture or more like tons bad dialogue. 

I was surprised that it took a whole twenty minutes before any stripping could begin. Normally the ladies are half way naked within the first few minutes. Not sure who builds a stripper pole in the middle of the barn but hey, whatever inspires you go for it. 

As fan I enjoyed the movie. I can appreciate the improvements made over the years and still remaining true to that raw and sometimes controversial topics. Some things that I did not care for was how long some scenes went for, I think they could have chopped a lot them to shorter scenes and some could have just not been used at all. There are some parts that do fit the narrative but some are completely useless. 

The terrible special effects are epic. Fake guts and all. I did enjoy the slow motion blood shower towards the end. Very climactic and pure eye candy. 

In conclusion, if you like B-Horror films with cheesy plots and nudity for the sake of nudity, then this would be worth the watch. If you are expecting something Hollywood style, clean, polished and rated R, then go somewhere else.

Visit billzebubproductions.com

Available in Blu Ray and streaming

All the links to purchase can be found at billzebubproductions-texas-chainsaw-mascara

My rating here will be 7/10

~Artemorbid